TAKE BACK YOUR HEART [ ATTACHMENT ]

TAKE BACK YOUR HEART

No one likes to fall. And few people would ever choose to drown. But in struggling the ocean of this life, sometimes it's so hard not to let the world in. Sometimes the ocean does enter us. The dunya does seep into our hearts.

And like the water that breaks the boat, when dunya enters, it shatters our heart. It shatters the boat. Recently, I was reminded of what a broken boat looks like, of what happens when you let everything in. I was reminded because I saw someone, just like me, fall in love too much with this life and seek to filled by the creation. So the ocean of dunya shattered her boat, as it had shattered mine, and she fell out into the water. But she stayed down too long, and didn't know how to come back up or what to hold on to.

So she drowned.

If you allow dunya to own your heart, like the ocean that owns the boat, it will take over. You will sink down to the depths of the sea. You will touch the ocean floor. And you will feel as though you were at your lowest point. Entrapped by your sins and the love of this life, you will feel broken, surrounded by darkness. That's the amazing thing about the floor or the ocean. No light reaches it.

However, this dark place is not the end. Remember that the darkness of night precedes the dawn. And as long as your heart still beats, this is not the death of it. You don't have to die here. Sometimes, the ocean floor is only a stop on the journey. And it is when you are at this lowest point, that you are faced with a choice. You can stay there at the bottom, until you drown. Or you can gather pearls and rise back up---stronger from the swim and richer from the jewels.

If you seek Him, God can raise you up, and replace the darkness of the ocean, with the light of His sun. He can transform what was once your greatest weakness into your greatest strength, and a means of growth, purification and redemption. Know that transformations sometimes begins with a fall. So never curse the fall. The ground is where humility lives. Take it. Learn it. Breathe it in. And then come back stronger, humbler and more aware of your need for Him. Come back having seen you own nothingness and His greatness. Know that if you have seen that Reality, you have seen much. For the one who is truly deceived is the one who sees his own self---but not Him. Deprived is the one who has never witnessed his own desperate need for God. Reliant on his own means, he forgets that the means, his own soul, and everything else in existence are His creation.

Seek God to bring you back up, for when He does, He will rebuild your ship. The heart that you thought was forever damaged will be mended. What was shattered will be whole again. Know that only He can do this. Seek Him.

And when He saves you, beg forgiveness for the fall, feel remorse over it---but not despair. And Ibn ul Qayyim (ra) has said: "Satan rejoiced when Adam (peace be upon him) came out of Paradise, but he did not know that when a diver sinks into the sea, he collects pearls and then rises again."

There is a powerful and amazing thing about tawbah (repentance) and turning back to Allah (SWT). We are told that it is a polish for the heart. What's amazing about a polish is that it doesn't just clean. It makes the object that is polished even shinier than it was before it got dirty. If you come back to God, seek His forgiveness, and refocus your life and heart on Him, you have the potential to be even richer than if you'd never fallen at all. Sometimes falling and coming back up gives you wisdom and humility that you may never otherwise have had. Ibn ul Qayyim (ra) writes:

"One of the Salaf (Pious Predecessors) said: "Indeed a servant commits a sin by which he enters Paradise; and another does a good deed by which he enters the Fire." It was asked: How is that? So he replied: "The one who committed the sin, constantly thinks about it; which causes him to fear it, regret it, weep over it and feel ashamed in front of his Lord---the Most High---due to it. He stands before Allah, broken-hearted and with his head lowered in humility. So this sin is more beneficial to him than doing many acts of obedience, since it caused him to have humility and humbleness---which leads to the servant's happiness and success---to the extent that this sin becomes the cause for him entering the Paradise. As for the doer of good, then he does not consider this good a favour from his Lord upon him. Rather, he becomes arrogant and amazed with himself, saying: I have achieved such and such, and such and such. So this further increases him in self-education, pride and arrogance---such that this becomes the cause for his destruction."

Allah (SWT) reminds us in the Qur'an to never lose hope. He says: "Says, 'O My servants who have transgressed against their souls [by sinning], despair not of the mercy of Allah. Indeed, Allah forgives all sins. Indeed, it is He who is the Forgiving, the Merciful." (Qur'an, 39:53)

And so, this is a call to all those who have become enslaved by the tyranny of the self, imprisoned in the dungeon of the nafs (self) and desires. It is a call to all those who have entered the ocean of dunya, who have sunk into its depths, and become trapped by its crushing waves. Rise up to your freedom. Rise up and come back to life. Leave the death of your soul behind you. Your heart can still live and be stronger and purer than it ever was. Does not the polish of tawbah remake the heart even more beautiful than it was? Remove the veil you have sewn with your sins. Remove the veil between you and Life, between you and Freedom, between you and Light---between you and God. Remove the veil and rise up. Come back to yourself. Come back to where you began. Come back Home. Know that when all the other doors have shut in your face, there is One that is always open. Always. Seek it. Seek Him and He will guide you through the waves of the cruel ocean, into the mercy of the sun.

This world cannot break you---unless you give it permission. And it cannot own you unless you hand it the keys---unless you give it your heart. And so, if you have handed those keys to dunya for a while---take them back. This isn't the End. You don't have to die here. Reclaim your heart and place it with its rightful owner:

God.

N / F : FROM "RECLAIM YOUR HEART", BY YASMIN MOGAHED.

RABIATUL ADAWIYAH [ BAB 3 - NAMANYA RABIAH ]

NAMANYA RABIAH

Suasana hening menjengah, masing-masing hanyut dalam perkiraan diri sendiri. Namun lidah mereka sentiasa dibasahi dengan zikir kepada Allah. Hanya itulah perkara yang tidak memerlukan modal malah diberikan ganjaran sama ada di dunia ataupun di akhirat.

     Tiba-tiba isteri Ismail berkata, "Sudah difikirkan nama anak kita? Biarpun dia lahir dalam kemiskinan, namun namanya mesti indah dan mempunyai makna yang baik. Semoga dengan berkat namanya, dia menjadi insan bertuah di dunia dan akhirat.

     Ismail hanya membatu, lama kemudian barulah dia bersuara, "Berehatlah dahulu isteriku, soal nama itu kita kemudiankan. Apa yang penting sekarang adalah kesihatanmu dan anak kita ini."

     "Tetapi, namakanlah dia. Kita tunaikan hak anak kita ini," kata isteri Ismail lembut.

     "Baiklah sekiranya begitu." Ismail kelihatan berfikir, lama dia memejamkan mata. Isterinya menanti dengan penuh harapan, selepas beberapa ketika dia bersuara, "Bagaimana sekiranya kita namakan anak kita ini Rabiah?"

     Isterinya kelihatan terkejut. "Rabiah? Bukankah maksudnya hanya yang keempat?"

     "Ya, itulah maksudnya."

     Isteri Ismail sedikit gusar dan hampa, namun dengan nada memujuk dia berkata, "Mungkinkah ada nama yang lebih manis untuk anak kita ini?"

     "Pada fikiranku, sesuai sekali anak kita ini dinamakan Rabiah kerana maksudnya yang keempat. Lagipun dia anak keempat yang lahir dalam keluarga kita."

     "Saya cuma khuatir, kelak dia diketawa dan diejek oleh teman-temannya apabila dewasa nanti. Apakah tiada nama yang lebih indah?"

     Ismail hanya membisu, sukar dibaca fikirannya. Seketika kemudian, isteri Ismail bersuara.

     "Sekiranya begitu, saya hanya menurut," kata isteri Ismail. Ada nada sebak di hujung lafaz. Namun sebagai isteri yang taat kepada suaminya, dia tetap menurut kehendak Ismail dengan reda walaupun kurang bersetuju dengan nama anak baru mereka itu.

     Sedang asyik mereka melayan lamunan di samping berzikir kepada Allah, mereka tersentak dengan suara tangan Rabiah, puteri yang baru lahir itu. Adik-beradik Rabiah yang masih tidur turut terjaga.

     "Alhamdulillah, adik kita sudah dilahirkan. Selamat datang ke dunia ini," ucap kakak sulung Rabiah.

     "Comelnya adik kita ini. Insya-Allah, kita sama-sama jaga dia nanti." Kakak Rabiah yang kedua teruja.

     "Adik ini sangat comel, saya pun sayang dan mahu jaga dia. Mengapa saya tidak boleh jaga adik?" Yang ketiga berkata seakan merajuk.

     "Bukan begitu, nanti kita sama-sama jaga adik. Kamu juga masih kecil, jadi kakak perlu jaga kamu juga." Kakak sulung mereka cuba memujuk.

     Mereka terus mengagah, melayan dan bermain-main dengan adik baru mereka itu. Mereka sangat bahagia hingga terlupa kemiskinan dan kesusahan yang mereka hadapi.

     "Ibu bangga dengan anak-anak ibu, semuanya baik-baik. Ibu doakan kamu semua menjadi insan yang solehah dan dirahmati oleh Allah," kata ibu mereka yang sangat bahagia melihat telatah anak-anaknya.

     "Walaupun kita miskin, Allah tetap kayakan kita dengan nikmat dan kasih sayang keluarga. Kami ada ayah yang menyayangi dan sentiasa berusaha untuk kebaikan kami. Kami ada ibu yang sentiasa memahami dan sayang kepada kami tanpa syarat. Tiada lagi kebahagiaan yang setara dengan ini semua." Anak sulung mereka petah berkata.

     "Benar ibu, kami reda. Kami tahu ini bukan pilihan kita melainkan ketentuan daripada Allah. Insya-Allah sedikit kesulitan di dunia ini akan membuahkan hasil yang besar di akhirat kelak."

     Adik mereka yang ketiga terpinga-pinga kerana kurang faham kata-kata kakak mereka. Dia hanya menatap wajah adik baru mereka dan menciumnya bertalu-talu. "Kakak sayangkan kamu. Kini saya sudah jadi kakak dan bukan lagi adik seperti dahulu. Kamu perlu panggil saya kakak." Mereka semua tergelak mendengar kata-kata adik mereka yang ketiga itu.

     "Apakah nama adik?" tanya kakak Rabiah yang ketiga. Lama dia menunggu, kelihatan Ismail berat mahu menjawab persoalan anak-anaknya itu. Namun apabila didesak dan dipujuk, dia akhirnya bersuara.

     "Wahai anak-anakku yang baik, nama adikmu ini Rabiah."

     "Rabiah?" Hampir serentak, mereka berpandangan sesama sendiri.

     "Mengapa hanya Rabiah?"

     "Bukankah ia satu nama yang agak ganjil?" kata yang kedua pula.

     "Tidak mengapa, walaupun namamu Rabiah, kami tetap menyayangimu," kata adik ketiga mereka sambil terus bermain-main dengan adik baru mereka.

     Kakak kedua Rabiah masih kurang berpuas hati, "Kelak, pasti dia jadi bahan ejekan orang. Saya tidak sanggup melihat dia dibuat begitu."

     "Menjadi tugas kita bagi melindungi adik kita ini. Kita jaga adik kita ini sebaik-baiknya."

     Ismail kemudiannya bersuara, "Nama itu hanya sandaran yang sementara. Ayah pun tidak tahu mengapa nama Rabiah yang menjadi pilihan ayah. Namun ayah yakin itu adalah ilham daripada Allah yang mengatakan Rabiah kelak menjadi hamba-Nya yang luar biasa."

     Mereka semua terdiam sejenak. Adik baru mereka yang comel ini hanya bernama Rabiah. Satu nama yang aneh lagi ganjil, bahkan mereka dapat merasakan adik mereka ini menjadi bahan ketawa masyarakat sekeliling kelak.

     Kakak sulung mereka merenung adiknya Rabiah. "Wahai adikku, apapun jua namamu, kami tetapi menyayangi dan mengasihimu. Kakak yakin ayah mendapat ilham daripada Allah, kerana itu kamu dinamakan Rabiah."

     Ismail kemudian mencuri perhatian anak-anaknya dengan berkata, "Anak-anakku, bolehkah kamu semua berjanji kepada ayah?"

     "Katakanlah ayah, insya-Allah selagi mampu kami pikul, kami tunaikannya." Anak keduanya menjawab sambil dipersetujui oleh adik dan kakaknya. Masing-masing menumpukan perhatian kepada ayah mereka, bersedia mendengar amanat yang bakal disampaikan.

     Ismail memulakan bicara, "Sekiranya nanti ayah dan ibu kamu pergi menghadap Allah lebih awal, ayat mewasiatkan adikmu ini kepada kamu bertiga. Jaga dan lindungilah dia, jadilah ayah dan ibu kepadanya. Dia masih kecil dan amat perlukan kasih sayang daripada kita semua."

     Ismail al-Adawiy seakan-akan mendapat bayangan yang dia dan isterinya akan terlebih dahulu menyambut seruan Ilahi, bertemu ajal yang sememangnya dijanjikan Allah kepada setiap yang hidup, tidak kira manusia mahupun binatang, malaikat mahupun iblis, syaitan dan jin.

     "Mengapa ayah berbicara begitu? Janganlah dibicarakan berkenaan mati dengan kehadiran dan kegembiraan menyambut adik kita ini." Anak sulung Ismail nampak kurang selesa dengan kata-katanya.

     Anak keduanya turut berkata, "Ya ayah, mengapa dibicarakan soal mati? Bukankah mati dan hidup kita itu di tangan Allah. Ayah juga pernah mengajar kami untuk reda dengan apa jua qadak dan qadar daripada Allah. Insya-Allah, sekiranya sesuatu terjadi kepada ayah dan ibu, kami tetap menjaga dan melindungi adik-adik saya."

     Ismail tersenyum. "Alhamdulillah, anak-anak ayah semuanya solehah. Bakal srikandi Islam, bahkan umat Islam bakal mendapat manfaat daripada kamu semua kelak. Itulah doa dan harapan ayah untuk kamu semua."

     Ibu mereka terus menadah tangan diikuti oleh semua yang lain, "Semoga Allah memperkenankan."

N / F : DIPETIK DARIPADA BUKU SRIKANDI SRIKANDI YANG BENAR, OLEH ZAHIRUDDIN ZABIDI.

THE OCEAN OF DUNYA

THE OCEAN OF DUNYA

Yesterday, I went to the beach. As I sat watching the massive California waves, I realized something strange. The ocean is so breathtakingly beautiful. But just as it is beautiful, it is also deadly. The same spellbinding waves, which we appreciate from the shore, can kill us if we enter them. Water, the same substance necessary to sustain life, can end life, in drawing. And the same ocean that hold ships float can shatter those ships to pieces.

This worldly life, the dunya, is just like the ocean. And our hearts are the ships. We can use the ocean for our needs and as a means to get to our final destination. But the ocean is only that: a means. It it a means for seeking food of the sea. It is a means of travel. It is a means of seeking a higher purpose. But it is something which we only pass through, yet never think to remain in. Imagine what would happen if the ocean became our end---rather than just a means.

Eventually we would drown.

As long as the ocean's water remains outside the ship, the ship will continue to float and be in control. But what happens as soon as the water creeps into the ship? What happens when the dunya is not just water outside of our hearts, when the dunya is no longer just a means? What happens when the dunya enters our heart?

That is when the boat sinks.

That is when the heart is taken hostage and becomes a slave. And that is when the dunya---which was once under our control---begins to control us. When the ocean's water enters and overtakes a ship, that ship is no longer in control. The boat then becomes at the ocean.

To stay afloat, we must view this world in exactly the same way, for Allah (SWT) has told us that, "Verily in the creation of the heavens and the earth are signs for those who reflect." (Qur'an, 3:190) We live in the dunya, and the dunya is in fact created for our use. Detachment from dunya (zuhd) does not mean that we do not interact with this world. Rather, the Prophet (SAW) has taught us that we must:

Anas (ra) said: "Three people came to the houses of the wives of the Prophet (SAW), may Allah bless him and grant him peace, to ask about how the Prophet (SAW) worshipped. When they were told, it was as if they thought it was little and said, 'Where are we in relation to the Messenger of Allah, may Allah bless him and grant him peace, who has been forgiven his past and future wrong actions?' He said, "One of them said, 'I will pray all of every night'. Another said, 'I will fast all the time and not break the fast'. The other said, 'I will withdraw from women and never marry'. The Messenger of Allah came to them and said, 'Are you the ones who said such-and-such? By Allah, I am the one among you with the most fear and awareness of Allah, but I fast and break the fast, I pray and I sleep, and I marry women. Whoever disdains my sunnah is not with me.'" [Agreed Upon]

The Prophet (SAW) did not withdraw from the dunya in order to be detached from it. His detachment was much deeper. It was the detachment of the heart. His ultimate attachment was only to Allah (SWT) and the home with Him, for he truly understood the words of God.

"What is the life of this world but amusement and play? But verily the Home in the Hereafter,---that is life indeed, if they but knew." (Qur'an, 29:64)

Detachment does not even mean that we cannot own things of the dunya. In fact many of the greatest companions were wealthy. Rather, detachment is that we view and interact with the dunya for what it really is: just a means. Detachment is when the dunya remains in our hand---not in our heart. As 'Ali (ra) expressed beautifully, "Detachment is not that you should own nothing, but that nothing should own you."

Like the ocean's water entering the boat, the moment that we let the dunya enter our heart, we will sink. The ocean was never intended to enter the boat; it was intended only as a means that must remain outside of it. The dunya, too, was never intended to enter heart. It is only a means that must not enter or control us. This is why Allah (SWT) repeatedly refers to the dunya in the Qur'an as a mata'a. The word mata'a can be translated as a "source for transitory worldly delight". It is a resource. It is a tool. It is the path---not the destination.

And it is this very concept that the Prophet (SAW) spoke about so eloquently when he said: 

"What relationship do I have with this world? I am in this world like a rider who halts in the shade of a tree for a short time, and after taking some rest, resumes his journey leaving the tree behind." (Ahmad, Tirmidhi)

Consider for a moment the metaphor of a traveler. What happens when you're traveling or you know that your stay is only temporary? When you're passing through a city for one night, how attached do you get to that place? If you know it's temporary, you'll be willing to stay at Motel 6. But would you like to live there? Probably not. Suppose your boss sent you to a new town to work on a limited project. Suppose he didn't tell you exactly when the project would end, but you knew that you could be returning home, any day. How would you be in that town? Would you invest in massive amounts of property and spend all your savings on expensive furniture and cars? Most likely not. Even while shopping, would you buy cart-loads of food and other perishables? No. You'd probably hesitate about buying any more than you need for a couple days---because your boss could call you back any day.

This is the mindset of a traveler. There is a natural detachment that comes with the realization that something is only temporary. That is what the Prophet (SAW) in his wisdom, is talking about in this profound hadith. He understood the danger of becoming engrossed in this life. In fact, there was nothing he feared for us more.

He (SAW) said, "By Allah I don't fear for you poverty, but I fear that the world would be abundant for you as it has been for those before you, so you compete for it as they have competed for it, so it destroys you as it has destroyed them." (Agreed upon)

The blessed Prophet (SAW) recognised the true nature of this life. He understood what it meant to be in the dunya, without being of it. He sailed the very same ocean that we all must. But his ship knew well from where it had come, and to where it was going. His was a boat that remained dry. He understood that the same ocean which sparkles in the sunlight will become a graveyard for the ships that enter it.

N / F : FROM "RECLAIM YOUR HEART", BY YASMIN MOGAHED.

RABIATUL ADAWIYAH [ BAB 2 - KELAHIRAN ]

KELAHIRAN

Hari yang dinanti-nanti pun tiba, kini genaplah sembilan bulan kandungan isteri Ismail al-Adawiy. Saat-saat menyambut kelahiran pun tiba. Namun pasangan ini masih dalam keadaan gundah memikirkan nasib bayi yang bakal lahir itu.

     Kelahiran yang sepatutnya disambut dengan kegembiraan itu, dilenyapkan oleh perasaan resah dek kemiskinan mereka.

     "Nampaknya, anak ini akan lahir pada bila-bila masa sahaja," kata isteri Ismail.

     "Sekiranya begitu, elok kita bersedia dan jangan buat kerja-kerja berat lagi. Urusan anak-anak serahkan kepada saya. Insya-Allah semuanya berjalan lancar."

     "Terima kasih, saya sangat bahagia di sisi abang. Alhamdulillah, walaupun miskin namun kaya dengan kasih sayang dan perhatian abang. Saya tidak menyesal bersuamikan abang."

     Ismail al-Adawiy hanya tersenyum mendengar kata-kata isterinya. Dalam hati dia terus berdoa supaya dilimpahkan rahmat daripada-Nya.

     Dinihari keesokan harinya isteri Ismail tiba-tiba mengerang kesakitan, kandungannnya itu akan keluar pada bila-bila masa. Dengan menggunakan apa yang ada, Ismail sendiri yang menjadi bidan kepada bayi itu.

     Bukan dia tidak biasa, ketiga-tiga anaknya yang lain pun, dia adalah bidannya.

     "Sabar isteriku, insya-Allah semuanya selamat," kata Ismail cuba menenangkan isterinya.

     Dia kemudian memberikan arahan kepada anak-anaknya yang lain supaya membantu. "Anak-anakku, ibu kamu akan melahirkan adik pada bila-bila masa sahaja, ayah minta kamu buat apa yang sepatutnya. Banyakkan berdoa kepada Allah."

     "Baiklah ayah," kata kakak yang sulung. Adiknya yang berdua itu, sekarang mengangguk faham.

     "Sediakan air panas untuk ibu, sekarang kamu ke luar dulu."

     Selepas beberapa ketika bergelumang dengan kesakitan, anak keempat mereka dilahirkan dengan selamat. Ismail dan isterinya menatap anak itu dengan kesayuan, Ismail segera melafazkan iqamat di telinga anaknya itu.

     "Anak kita lelaki ataupun perempuan?"

     Ismail menjawab sambil memandang tepat ke wajah isterinya, "Seperti yang saya katakan dahulu, biar lelaki ataupun perempuan. Kita reda menerimanya."

     Fahamlah isterinya bahawa anak yang baru dilahirkan itu adalah bayi perempuan. "Tidak mengapa, ada hikmah di sebalik ketentuan Allah ini. Tidak semestinya perkara yang kita suka itu baik untuk kita, bahkan tidak semestinya perkara yang buruk itu tidak baik untuk kita."

     "Benar isteriku, kita mesti reda dan yakin yang Allah itu maha pengasih dan penyayang."

     Mereka terdiam sejenak, masing-masing menatap bayi perempuan yang baru lahir itu. Pilu menyelubungi hati. "Apakah tidak ada walaupun sehelai kain bagi kita membalut tubuh kecil anak kita?"

     "Tidak ada isteriku, melainkan apa yang kita pakai ini." Lemah sahaja bunyi suara Ismail.

     "Sekiranya begitu, apakah mungkin sekiranya kita minta tolong dengan jiran-jiran kita? Mungkin mereka sudi menolong?" Isteri Ismail bertanya sambil memberi cadangan.

     "Insya-Allah, saya cuba."

     Ismail lantas bingkas menuju ke luar rumah, dia berpaling dan berkata, "Insya-allah, saya usahakan. Namun janganlah mengharap selain daripada Allah. Sekiranya ada rezeki, mesti jiran kita sudi membantu. Sekiranya Allah tidak membenarkan, maka tiadalah jiran kita yang sudi membantu."

     "Saya tahu, walaupun kita miskin tetapi kita tidak pernah meminta-minta. Mungkin untuk kali ini sahaja, demi anak ini."

     "Berdoalah kepada Allah."

     Ismail menuju ke rumah jiran-jirannya, pintu diketuk satu persatu namun tiada yang mahu membuka malah salam yang disampaikan pun tidak dijawab.

     Di dalam rumah, Lahab suami kepada Maimun berkata, "Diam, jangan kamu buka pintu itu."

     Maimun menjawab, "Tetapi bunyinya jiran kita itu dalam kesusahan. Adalah tidak wajar kita tidak membantunya."

     Lahab menjengilkan matanya, marah kepada isterinya, "Baik sangatkah kamu, kita ini pun makan pagi kais pagi, makan petang kais petang."

     "Saya tahu isteri Ismail tentu sudah melahirkan anaknya yang keempat, mungkin kerana itu dia ke sini. Bantulah mereka walaupun sedikit. Amat besar pahalanya orang yang memberi di kala mereka memerlukan."

     "Sudah, saya tidak mahu dengar." Lahab menamatkan perbualan dengan isterinya. Isterinya pula tidak boleh berbuat apa-apa kerana tahu suaminya tidak suka sekiranya dia menolong Ismail.

     Dalam keadaan lemah longlai, Ismail meneruskan langkah ke rumah jirannya yang yang berada. Selepas memberi salam, juwairiah atau orang suruhan rumah itu keluar.

     "Apakah tuanmu ada di rumah?" tanya Ismail.

     "Apakah hajat tuan ingin berjumpa dengan tuan saya?" Juwairiah itu membalas.

     "Katakan kepadanya, Ismail al-Adawiy yang tinggal di hujung sana meminta ihsan sekiranya ada kain yang sudah mahu dibuang dan sedikit minyak untuk isteri saya yang baru bersalin." Ismail menyusun kata.

     "Baiklah, saya akan khabarkan kepadanya."

     Seketika kemudian, juwairiah itu muncul kembali dengan muka yang serba salah. "Tuan, maafkan saya. Tuan saya berkata dia tidak akan memberi kepada orang yang meminta tanpa berusaha. Katanya hanya orang yang malas meminta-minta, sedangkan dia pun bekerja keras, barulah dapat memiliki harta-harta ini. Dia minta tuan pergi dari sini."

     "Tidak mengapa, hanya Allah yang lebih mengetahui perihal hamba-Nya." Bertimpa-timpa malang Ismail, jirannya juga tidak mahu menghulurkan bantuan. Bahkan untuk rumah-rumah yang seterusnya pun keadaan yang sama berlaku. Akhirnya dia pulang dengan tangan kosong. Terus dia berfikir bagaimana mahu berdepan dengan isterinya nanti.

     Dengan lembut Ismail al-Adawiy menghampiri isterinya yang sedang lena di samping bayi mereka yang baru lahir itu. Seketika kemudian isterinya terjaga sambil tersenyum, lantas Ismail berkata kepada isterinya, "Isteriku, milik siapakah hidup ini dan segala isinya?"

     "Tentunya milik Allah."

     "Sekiranya kita minta kepada-Nya, adakah Dia makbulkan?"

     "Sudah tentu, bukankah Allah pernah berkata yang maksudnya, mintalah kepadaKu, nescaya akanKu perkenankan."

     "Sekiranya tidak diperkenankan?"

     "Maksudnya Allah tidak kurniakan sekarang. Mungkin pada masa hadapan, mungkin juga doa itu kelak dibalas di akhirat kelak."

     Ismail tersenyum dan hatinya berasa sangat tenang. Isterinya bukan sahaja sanggup bersamanya malah dia juga sanggup berkorban untuk mereka sekeluarga. "Sekiranya begitu, janganlah bersedih sekiranya kita meminta kepada sesama makhluk dan mereka tidak memberi, kerana ini adalah ketentuan Allah."

     Fahamlah isteri Ismail, tiada jiran sudi menghulurkan bantuan kepada mereka. "Tidak mengapalah, mereka juga manusia biasa, semoga Allah merahmati mereka."

     "Kita selimutkan sahaja anak kita ini dengan kain yang ada. Walaupun usang dan kotor, ia lebih baik daripada pemberian yang syubhah. Insya-Allah, kita yakin yang Allah itu maha bijaksana. Mungkin Allah mahu memelihara kita dan anak kita ini daripada perkara syubhah, yang tidak jelas halal dan haramnya."

     Bayi yang baru lahir itu seakan-akan mengerti kata-kata dan penderitaan yang dihadapi oleh kedua-dua orang tuanya, lantas dia segera mendiamkan diri dan tidak menangis lagi.

     "Semoga dirimu menjadi hamba Allah yang bertakwa, anakku." Ismail dan isterinya berdoa.

N / F : DIPETIK DARIPADA BUKU SRIKANDI SRIKANDI YANG BENAR, OLEH ZAHIRUDDIN ZABIDI.

PEACE ON A ROOFTOP [ ATTACHMENT ]

PEACE ON A ROOFTOP

We've all had intense moments. For me, one such moment happened while standing on the rooftop of Masjid al-Haram. Above me was only sky, below me, the most beautiful view of Kaba'a and an acute sign of Allah, this life, and the life to come. I was surrounded by an overwhelming crowd---that exists nowhere else on this earth---but, for me, it could have been that I was standing completely alone. With Allah.

I brought with me to that rooftop so much heartache, confusion, and doubt. I came with so much weakness, human frailty, and pain. Standing at a crossroads in my life, I brought with me fear of what was to come, and hope in what could be. So. as I stood on that roof, I remembered the story of Musa ('alayhi assalam---may Allah be pleased with him) standing at the Red Sea. His physical eyes saw nothing but a wall of water, entrapping him as an army approached; but his spiritual eyes saw only Allah, and a way out so certain it was as if he had already taken it. While the voices of his people---bereft of trust or hope---spoke only of being overtaken, Musa (as) did not waiver.

As I stood there, I heard the distant voices warning me of what was to come---but my heart heard only, "Inna ma'iya rabee sa yahdeen... Truly my Lord is with me, He will guide me through." (Qur'an, 26:62)

However seeing through the illusion of hardship, confusion and pain that surround us can only happen when we allow our heart to focus. The foundation of Islam is tawheed (Oneness), but tawheed is not just about saying that God is One. It is so much deeper. It is about the Oneness of purpose, of fear, of worship, of ultimate love of God. It is the oneness of vision and focus. It is to direct one's sight on one singular point, allowing everything else to fall into place.

One of the most beautiful traditions of the Prophet (SAW) captures this concept perfectly. He (SAW) said: "Whoever makes the Hereafter his preoccupation, then Allah places freedom from want in his heart, gathers his affairs, and Dunya (worldly life) comes to him despite being reluctant to do so. And whoever makes Dunya his preoccupation, then Allah places his poverty in front of his eyes, make his affairs scattered, and nothing of the Dunya comes to him except that which has been decreed for him." [At-Tirmidhi]

If you've ever seen a "magic eye" picture, you can see a wonderful metaphor of this truth. At first glance, the picture looks like nothing but a collection of shapes, with no order or purpose. But if you start by bringing the picture right up to your face, focusing your eye on one singular point, as you move the picture slowly away from your face, the picture suddenly becomes clear. However, as soon as you take your eyes off that singular point of focus, the picture disappears and again becomes nothing but a sea of shapes.

In the same way, the more we focus on the dunya, the more our matters become scattered. The more we run after the dunya, the more it runs away from us. The more we chase wealth, ironically, the more poverty we feel. If money is the focus, you will find that no matter how much money you have, you will always fear losing it. This preoccupation is poverty itself. That is why the Prophet (SAW) says about such people that poverty is always in front of their eyes. That is all they see. No matter how much they have, there is no contentment, only greed for more and fear of loss. But, for the ones who focus on Allah, the dunya comes to them, and Allah puts contentment in their hearts. Even if they have less, they feel rich, and are more willing to give from that wealth.

And when such people trapped by life, by financial hardship, by pain, by loneliness, by fear, by heartbreak, or sadness, all they have to do is turn to Allah, and He always makes a way out for them. Know that this is not some feel-good theory. It is a promise. A promise made by Allah Himself, who says in the Qur'an:

"...And for those who fear Allah, He (ever) prepares a way out, And He provides for him from (sources) he never could imagine. And if any one puts his trust in Allah, sufficient is (Allah) for him...." (Qur'an, 65:2-3)

Allah is sufficient for them. Allah is enough. For those who make Allah their primary concern, there is only peace, because whatever happens to them in this life it is good and accepted as the will of Allah. Imagine having only good in your life. That is the state of this type of believer, as the Prophet (SAW) says: "Wondrous are the believer's affairs. For him there is good in all his affairs, and this is so only for the believer. When something pleasing happens to him, he is grateful, and that is good for him; and when something displeasing happens to him, he is enduring (has sabr), and that is good for him." [Muslim]

And so in the heart of such a believer is a sort of paradise. That is the paradise that Ibn Taymiyyah, may Allah have mercy on his soul, spoke of when he said: 'Truly, there is a Heaven in this world, [and] whoever does not enter it, will not enter the Heaven of the next world.'

And in that heaven, complete peace is not something of a moment. It is a state, eternal.

N / F : FROM "RECLAIM YOUR HEART", BY YASMIN MOGAHED.

RABIATUL ADAWIYAH [ BAB 1 - REDA DERITA ]

REDA DERITA

Dihinari itu hening, seiring dengan udara yang sangat dingin, sayup-sayup terdengar suara azan dari tengah kota, menandakan waktu subuh sudah menjengah. Di sebuah pondok kecil di hujung kampung, sepasang suami isteri sedang berbicara halus supaya tidak mengejutkan anak-anak mereka yang lain.

     Ismail al-Adawiy, suami kepada isteri yang bakal melahirkan itu bersuara, "Isteriku, bersabar dan tabahlah. Tuhan sentiasa bersama orang yang sabar."

     Ismail menyedari keperitan hidup yang mereka lalui itu.

     "Saya faham, tetapi semakin hari kita semakin susah. Tidakkah ada ikhtiar bagi kita mengatasinya? Saya sangat kasihankan anak-anak kita. Lagipun tidak lama lagi kita bakal menyambut kelahiran anak keempat. Isterinya yang setia tidak mengeluh tetapi sekadar berkongsi dengan suami tersayang.

     "Kita sudah berusaha sedaya yang mampu, namun Tuhan sudah tetapkan rezeki kita sebanyak ini. Alhamdulillah." Ismail cuba menenangkan isterinya.

     "Marilah kita solat subuh, kejutkan anak-anak kita. Sama-sama kita berdoa kepada Tuhan. Semoga Tuhan kasihankan kita."

     Sambil merenung ke langit kelam yang berbintang, Ismail memanjat doa kepada Tuhan seusai solat subuh berjemaah, bersama ketiga-tiga anaknya. Walaupun miskin, Ismail menekankan tarbiah Islam dalam keluarganya.

     "Bilakah adik kita lahir?" tanya anak sulung Ismail.

     "Insya-Allah, tidak lama lagi," jawab Ismail.

     Ibu mereka hanya tersenyum.

     Anak kedua mereka pula bertanya, "Adik ini lelaki ataupun perempuan?"

     Ibu mereka sambil senyum berkata, "Kita serahkan semuanya kepada Tuhan. Ibu dan ayah tidak tahu kerana adik kamu masih di dalam perut."

     Yang ketiga pula menyampuk seraya memeluk dan menekap telinga ke perut ibunya, "Ibu, nanti ibu tidak sayang saya lagi. Ibu akan sayang adik ini sahaja."

     Isteri Ismail memeluk kesemua anak mereka dengan air mata mengalir di pipi. Melihat gelagat anak-anak gadisnya yang polos itu, hatinya begitu terusik, kasihan kepada anak-anaknya yang terpaksa membesar dalam kedaifan.

     "Ibu menangis? Mengapa ibu menangis? Ibu menangis, kami pun rasa mahu menangis." Masing-masing bergenang air mata.

     "Ibu menangis kerana sayangkan kamu semua. Sebab itu kamu perlu jadi anak yang solehah, jadi muslimah sejati yang taat kepada Allah dan rasul, yang kelak berbakti kepada ibu dan ayah."

     Mereka sekadar mengangguk. "Maknanya, sekiranya kami menangis, tandanya kami sayang kepada ibu dan ayah?"

     Anak-anak kecil itu masih kurang mengerti apakah makna air mata ibu mereka itu. Ayah mereka juga kesayuan mengenangkan nasib keluarga mereka. Dia hanya mampu bersandar di dinding tanah liat pondok usang mereka, mulutnya dibasahi dengan zikir kepada Allah.

     Katanya kepada anak-anak itu, "Yakinlah anak-anakku, Allah hanya tetapkan yang terbaik untuk hamba-hamba-Nya. Yakinlah, sekiranya bukan di dunia kita senang, kita masih punya peluang di akhirat. Asalkan kita menjadi hamba Allah yang baik, melaksanakan yang disuruh-Nya dan meninggalkan yang dilarang-Nya."

     "Kami faham ayah," jawab anak-anak gadis itu serentak.

     Saat Ismail dan isterinya mendapat tahu yang mereka bakal mendapat anak yang keempat, kedua-duanya menerima perkhabaran itu dengan perasaan yang bercampur baur.

     "Abang, semakin bertambahlah beban kita kelak. Bahkan anak kita yang bertiga ini pun belum sempurna makan dan minumnya."

     "Isteriku, anak itu adalah amanah dan rezeki daripada Allah. Pasti ada hikmahnya kelahiran anak kita yang keempat ini. Semoga dia menjadi anak yang soleh dan patuh pada kedua ibu bapa."

     "Saya juga berharap anak kita ini dapat membantu meringankan beban kita kelak."

     "Semoga dia dapat menjaga dan bertanggungjawab pada kakak-kakaknya apabila saya sudah tiada, insya-Allah." Begitulah bicara mereka berdua. Sangat berharap dan sentiasa berdoa bagi mendapatkan seorang anak lelaki.

     Isteri Ismail tiba-tiba bertanya, "Bagaimana sekiranya anak ini seorang bayi perempuan?"

     Ismail terdiam seketika, kemudian berkata, "Lelaki ataupun perempuan, dia tetap anak kita. Kedua-duanya adalah rezeki daripada Allah kepada kita, apakah mampu kita menolak qadak dan qadar Allah ini?"

     Ismail menyambung, "Salah satu rukun iman adalah beriman dengan qadak dan qadar Allah. Dalam erti kata lain, kita perlu sentiasa menerima nasib baik ataupun buruk daripada Allah dengan reda dan yakin, segala apa yang terjadi adalah yang terbaik daripada Allah."

     Isteri Ismail kagum dengan sifat reda suaminya. "Baiklah, saya juga reda pada qadak dan qadar Allah. Akhlak yang abang tunjukkan menjadi tunjang kekuatan saya. Saya tidak kisah kita miskin, asalkan kita sekeluarga bahagia."

     Hari kelahiran bayi keempat mereka sudah hampir, namun persediaan bagi menyambut bayi itu belum diuruskan. Bahkan sehelai kain baharu pun tiada, kain yang ada cuma di badan mereka.

     "Bagaimana persediaan kita bagi menyambut kelahiran anak kita nanti?" tanya isteri Ismail sebaik sahaja dia pulang daripada bekerja.

     "Nampaknya tidak ada apa yang mampu kita sediakan," jawab Ismail lemah.

     "Saya cuma khuatir kesihatan anak kita kelak."

     Ismail mendiamkan diri, sekadar menarik nafas dalam-dalam. "Insya-Allah, akan ada pertolongan daripada Allah untuk hamba-Nya."

     "Janganlah memaksa diri sekiranya itu semua di luar kemampuan kita."

     "Tetapi, paling kurang kita perlu buat persediaan walaupun sedikit."

     "Sekiranya begitu, nanti saya tanyakan kepada jiran-jiran. Insya-Allah ada antara mereka yang sudi memberikan sumbang ikhlas kepada kita." Isteri Ismail memberi cadangan kepada suaminya.

N / F : DIPETIK DARIPADA BUKU SRIKANDI SRIKANDI YANG BENAR, OLEH ZAHIRUDDIN ZABIDI.

FOR THE LOVE OF THE GIFT [ ATTACHMENT ]

FOR THE LOVE OF THE GIFT

We all love gifts. We love the blessings that beautify our lives. We love our children, our spouses, our parents, our friends. We love our youth and we love our health. We love our homes, our cars, our money, and our beauty. But what happens when a gift becomes more than just a gift? What happens when a wants becomes a need, a favor becomes a dependency? What happens when a gift is no longer only that?

What is a gift? A gift is something that did not come from us. A gift is given---and can be taken. We are not the original owners of a gift. A gift is also not necessary for our survival. It comes and goes. We want and love to receive gifts---but they are not necessary to our existence. We don't depend on them. We don't live to receive them and do not die if we don't. They are not our air or our food, but we love them. Who does not love a gift? Who does not love to receive many gifts? And we ask Al Kareem (The Most Generous) to never deprive us of His gifts. Yet, a gift is still not where we place our dependencies, nor do we die without them.

Remember that there are two places to hold something: in the hand or in the heart. Where do we hold a gift? A gift is no held in the heart. It is held in the hand. So when the gift is taken, the loss creates pain to the hand---but not to the heart. And anyone who has lived long enough in this life knows that the pain of the hand is not like the pain of the heart. The pain of the heart is to lose an object of attachment, addiction, dependency. That pain is like no other pain. It's not normal pain. And that pain is how we will know we just lost an object of attachment---a gift that was held in the wrong place.

The pain of the hand is also pain---but different. So different. The pain of the hand is to lose, but not something we are dependent upon. When a gift is taken out of the hand---or never given at all---we will feel the normal human pain of loss. We will grieve. We will cry. But the pain is only in the hand; our heart remains whole and beating. This is because the heart is only for God.

And God alone.

If we examine the things in our lives that cause us the most pain or fear, we can start to pinpoint which gifts have been stored in the wrong place. If not being able to get married, be with the person we want, have a child, find a job, look a certain way, get a degree, or reach a certain status has consumed us, we need to make a change. We need to shift where the gift is being stored; we need to move the gift out of our heart and back to our hand where it belongs.

We can love these things. It's human to love. And it's human to want the gifts we love. But our problem begins when we put the gift in our heart, and God in our hand. Ironically, we believe that we can live without God---but if we were to lose a gift, we crumble and can't go on.

As a result, we can easily put God aside, but our heart cannot live without the gift. In fact, we can even put God aside for the sake of the gift. So it becomes easy for us to delay or miss a prayer, but just don't deprive me of my work meeting, my movie, my outing, my shopping, my class, my party, or my basketball game. It's easy to take interest bearing loans or sell alcohol, just don't deprive me of my profit margin and prestigious career. Just don't deprive me of my brand new car, and over-the-top home. It's easy to have a haram relationship or date, but just don't deprive me of my beauty, my looks, my marriage proposals, or my image in front of people. It's easy to put aside the modesty that God says is beautiful, but don't deprive me of my skinny jeans---because society told me that's beauty.

This happens because the gift is in our heart, while Allah is in our hand. And what is in the hand can be put aside easily. What is in the heart, we cannot live without---and would sacrifice anything to have. But sooner or later we need to ask ourselves what it is that we really worship. The gift or the Giver? The beauty or the Source and Definition of Beauty? The provision or or the Provider?

The creation or the Creator?

The tragedy of our choice is that we chain our necks with attachments, and then ask why we choke. We put aside our Real air, and then wonder why we can't breathe. We give up our only food, and then complain when we're dying or starvation. After all, we stick the knife in our chest and then cry because it hurts. So much. But what we have done, we have done to ourselves.

Allah says:

"And whatever affliction befalls you, it is on account of what your hands have wrought, and (yet) He pardons most (of your faults)." (Qur'an, 42:30)

Yes. What we have done, we have done to ourselves, but look how the ayah ends: "He pardons most." The word used here is ya'foo' from God's attribute Al-A'foo. This denotes not just forgiving or pardoning, but completely erasing! So no matter how many times we stick that knife in our own chest, God can heal us---as if the stab had never occurred! Al Jabbar (the One who mends) can mend it.

If you seek Him.

But how foolish is the one who exchanges air for a necklace? He is the one who says, "Give me the necklace, and then you can take away my air after that. Suffocate me, but just make sure I'm wearing the necklace when I die." And the irony of it all is the necklace itself that suffocates us. It is our own objects of attachment---the things we love more that God---that kill us.

Our problem began because we saw the gift as the air, instead of just that: a gift. So in our blindness, we became dependent on the gift, and put aside the Real air. As a result when the gift was taken back, or never given at all, we thought we could not go on. But, this was a lie that we told ourselves, until we believed it. It isn't true. There's only one loss that we can't recover from. There's only one reason we wouldn't be able to go on: If we lost God in our lives. The irony is that many of us have lost God in our lives and we think we're still alive. Our false dependencies on His gifts have deceived us, so much.

Only God is our survival. Not His gifts. God is our support and our only true necessity. Allah says:

"Is not God enough for His Servant? But they try to frighten thee with other (gods) besides Him! For such as God leaves to stray, there can be no guide." (Qur'an, 39:36)

We all have needs and we all have wants. Our true suffering begins when we turn our wants into needs, and our one true need (God) into a commodity we think we can do without. Our true suffering begins when we confuse the means and the End. God is the only End. Every other thing is the means. We will suffer the moment we take our eyes off the End and get lost in the means.

In fact, the true purpose of the gift itself is to bring us to God. Even the gift is a means. For example, does the Prophet (SAW) not say that marriage is half of deen? Why? If used correctly, few other parts of this life can have such a comprehensive effect on the development of one's character. You can read about qualities like patience, gratitude, mercy, humility, generosity, self-denial, and you are put in a situation in which they are tested.

Gifts like marriage will be a means to bring you closer to God---so long as they remain a means, not an End. God's gifts will remain a means to Him, so long as they are held in the hand, not the heart. Remember that whatever lives in the heart controls you. It becomes what you depend on at a fundamental level. It, therefore, must be something that never leaves. Only one thing is like that: The Creator.

N / F : FROM "RECLAIM YOUR HEART", BY YASMIN MOGAHED.